WOMEN IN ISLAM VERSUS WOMEN IN THE
JUDAEO-CHRISTIAN TRADITION:
THE MYTH &
THE REALITY
BY
Dr. Sherif Abdel Azeem
1. INTRODUCTION
Five years ago, I read in the Toronto Star issue of July 3, 1990
an article titled "Islam is not alone in patriarchal doctrines",
by Gwynne Dyer. The article described the furious reactions of the
participants of a conference on women and power held in Montreal
to the comments of the famous Egyptian feminist Dr. Nawal Saadawi.
Her "politically incorrect" statements included : "the most
restrictive elements towards women can be found first in Judaism
in the Old Testament then in Christianity and then in the Quran";
"all religions are patriarchal because they stem from patriarchal
societies"; and "veiling of women is not a specifically Islamic
practice but an ancient cultural heritage with analogies in sister
religions". The participants could not bear sitting around while
their faiths were being equated with Islam. Thus, Dr. Saadawi
received a barrage of criticism. "Dr. Saadawi's comments are
unacceptable. Her answers reveal a lack of understanding about
other people's faiths," declared Bernice Dubois of the World
Movement of Mothers. "I must protest" said panellist Alice Shalvi
of Israel women's network, "there is no conception of the veil in
Judaism." The article attributed these furious protests to the
strong tendency in the West to scapegoat Islam for practices that
are just as much a part of the West's own cultural heritage.
"Christian and Jewish feminists were not going to sit around being
discussed in the same category as those wicked Muslims," wrote
Gwynne Dyer.
I
was not surprised that the conference participants had held such a
negative view of Islam, especially when women's issues were
involved. In the West, Islam is believed to be the symbol of the
subordination of women par excellence. In order to
understand how firm this belief is, it is enough to mention that
the Minister of Education in France, the land of Voltaire, has
recently ordered the expulsion of all young Muslim women wearing
the veil from French schools!
[1] A young Muslim student wearing a headscarf is denied her
right of education in France, while a Catholic student wearing a
cross or a Jewish student wearing a skullcap is not. The scene of
French policemen preventing young Muslim women wearing headscarves
from entering their high school is unforgettable. It inspires the
memories of another equally disgraceful scene of Governor George
Wallace of Alabama in 1962 standing in front of a school gate
trying to block the entrance of black students in order to prevent
the desegregation of Alabama's schools. The difference between the
two scenes is that the black students had the sympathy of so many
people in the U.S. and in the whole world. President Kennedy sent
the U.S. National Guard to force the entry of the black students.
The Muslim girls, on the other hand, received no help from any
one. Their cause seems to have very little sympathy either inside
or outside France. The reason is the widespread misunderstanding
and fear of anything Islamic in the world today.
What intrigued me the most about the Montreal conference was one
question : Were the statements made by Saadawi, or any of her
critics, factual ? In other words, do Judaism, Christianity, and
Islam have the same conception of women? Are they different in
their conceptions ? Do Judaism and Christianity , truly, offer
women a better treatment than Islam does? What is the Truth?
It
is not easy to search for and find answers to these difficult
questions. The first difficulty is that one has to be fair and
objective or, at least, do one's utmost to be so. This is what
Islam teaches. The Quran has instructed Muslims to say the truth
even if those who are very close to them do not like it: "Whenever
you speak, speak justly, even if a near relative is concerned"
(6:152) "O you who believe stand out firmly for justice, as
witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents or
your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor" (4:135).
The other great difficulty is the overwhelming breadth of the
subject. Therefore, during the last few years, I have spent many
hours reading the Bible, The Encyclopaedia of Religion, and the
Encyclopaedia Judaica searching for answers. I have also read
several books discussing the position of women in different
religions written by scholars, apologists, and critics. The
material presented in the following chapters represents the
important findings of this humble research. I don't claim to be
absolutely objective. This is beyond my limited capacity. All I
can say is that I have been trying, throughout this research, to
approach the Quranic ideal of "speaking justly".
I
would like to emphasize in this introduction that my purpose for
this study is not to denigrate Judaism or Christianity. As
Muslims, we believe in the divine origins of both. No one can be a
Muslim without believing in Moses and Jesus as great prophets of
God. My goal is only to vindicate Islam and pay a tribute, long
overdue in the West, to the final truthful Message from God to the
human race. I would also like to emphasize that I concerned myself
only with Doctrine. That is, my concern is, mainly, the position
of women in the three religions as it appears in their original
sources not as practised by their millions of followers in the
world today. Therefore, most of the evidence cited comes from the
Quran, the sayings of Prophet Muhammad, the Bible, the Talmud, and
the sayings of some of the most influential Church Fathers whose
views have contributed immeasurably to defining and shaping
Christianity. This interest in the sources relates to the fact
that understanding a certain religion from the attitudes and the
behaviour of some of its nominal followers is misleading. Many
people confuse culture with religion, many others do not know what
their religious books are saying, and many others do not even
care.
2. EVE'S FAULT ?
The three religions agree on one basic fact: Both women and men
are created by God, The Creator of the whole universe. However,
disagreement starts soon after the creation of the first man,
Adam, and the first woman, Eve. The Judaeo-Christian conception of
the creation of Adam and Eve is narrated in detail in Genesis
2:4-3:24. God prohibited both of them from eating the fruits of
the forbidden tree. The serpent seduced Eve to eat from it and
Eve, in turn, seduced Adam to eat with her. When God rebuked Adam
for what he did, he put all the blame on Eve, "The woman you put
here with me --she gave me some fruit from the tree and I ate it."
Consequently, God said to Eve:
"I will greatly increase your pains in
childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your
desire will be for your husband and he will rule over you."
To
Adam He said:
"Because you listened to your wife and ate from the
tree .... Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful
toil you will eat of it all the days of your life..."
The Islamic conception of the first creation is found in several
places in the Quran, for example:
"O Adam dwell with your wife in the Garden and
enjoy as you wish but approach not this tree or you run into harm
and transgression. Then Satan whispered to them in order to reveal
to them their shame that was hidden from them and he said: 'Your
Lord only forbade you this tree lest you become angels or such
beings as live forever.' And he swore to them both that he was
their sincere adviser. So by deceit he brought them to their fall:
when they tasted the tree their shame became manifest to them and
they began to sew together the leaves of the Garden over their
bodies. And their Lord called unto them: 'Did I not forbid you
that tree and tell you that Satan was your avowed enemy?' They
said: 'Our Lord we have wronged our own souls and if You forgive
us not and bestow not upon us Your Mercy, we shall certainly be
lost' " (7:19:23).
A
careful look into the two accounts of the story of the Creation
reveals some essential differences. The Quran, contrary to the
Bible, places equal blame on both Adam and Eve for their mistake.
Nowhere in the Quran can one find even the slightest hint that Eve
tempted Adam to eat from the tree or even that she had eaten
before him. Eve in the Quran is no temptress, no seducer, and no
deceiver. Moreover, Eve is not to be blamed for the pains of
childbearing. God, according to the Quran, punishes no one for
another's faults. Both Adam and Eve committed a sin and then asked
God for forgiveness and He forgave them both.
3. EVE'S LEGACY
The image of Eve as temptress in the Bible has resulted in an
extremely negative impact on women throughout the Judaeo-Christian
tradition. All women were believed to have inherited from their
mother, the Biblical Eve, both her guilt and her guile.
Consequently, they were all untrustworthy, morally inferior, and
wicked. Menstruation, pregnancy, and childbearing were considered
the just punishment for the eternal guilt of the cursed female
sex. In order to appreciate how negative the impact of the
Biblical Eve was on all her female descendants we have to look at
the writings of some of the most important Jews and Christians of
all time. Let us start with the Old Testament and look at excerpts
from what is called the Wisdom Literature in which we find:
"I find more bitter than death the woman who is a
snare, whose heart is a trap and whose hands are chains. The man
who pleases God will escape her, but the sinner she will
ensnare....while I was still searching but not finding, I found
one upright man among a thousand but not one upright woman among
them all" (Ecclesiastes 7:26-28).
In
another part of the Hebrew literature which is found in the
Catholic Bible we read:
"No wickedness comes anywhere near the wickedness
of a woman.....Sin began with a woman and thanks to her we all
must die" (Ecclesiasticus 25:19,24).
Jewish Rabbis listed nine curses inflicted on women as a result of
the Fall:
"To the woman He gave nine curses and death: the
burden of the blood of menstruation and the blood of virginity;
the burden of pregnancy; the burden of childbirth; the burden of
bringing up the children; her head is covered as one in mourning;
she pierces her ear like a permanent slave or slave girl who
serves her master; she is not to be believed as a witness; and
after everything--death."
[2]
To
the present day, orthodox Jewish men in their daily morning prayer
recite "Blessed be God King of the universe that Thou has not made
me a woman." The women, on the other hand, thank God every morning
for "making me according to Thy will."
[3] Another prayer found in many Jewish prayer books: "Praised
be God that he has not created me a gentile. Praised be God that
he has not created me a woman. Praised be God that he has not
created me an ignoramus."
[4]
The Biblical Eve has played a far bigger role in Christianity than
in Judaism. Her sin has been pivotal to the whole Christian faith
because the Christian conception of the reason for the mission of
Jesus Christ on Earth stems from Eve's disobedience to God. She
had sinned and then seduced Adam to follow her suit. Consequently,
God expelled both of them from Heaven to Earth, which had been
cursed because of them. They bequeathed their sin, which had not
been forgiven by God, to all their descendants and, thus, all
humans are born in sin. In order to purify human beings from their
'original sin', God had to sacrifice Jesus, who is considered to
be the Son of God, on the cross. Therefore, Eve is responsible for
her own mistake, her husband's sin, the original sin of all
humanity, and the death of the Son of God. In other words, one
woman acting on her own caused the fall of humanity.
[5] What about her daughters? They are sinners like her and
have to be treated as such. Listen to the severe tone of St. Paul
in the New Testament:
"A woman should learn in quietness and full
submission. I don't permit a woman to teach or to have authority
over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first, then
Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was
deceived and became a sinner" (I Timothy 2:11-14).
St. Tertullian was even more blunt than St. Paul, while he was
talking to his 'best beloved sisters' in the faith, he said:
[6]
"Do you not know that you are each an Eve? The
sentence of God on this sex of yours lives in this age: the guilt
must of necessity live too. You are the Devil's gateway: You are
the unsealer of the forbidden tree: You are the first deserter of
the divine law: You are she who persuaded him whom the devil was
not valiant enough to attack. You destroyed so easily God's image,
man. On account of your desert even the Son of God had to die."
St. Augustine was faithful to the legacy of his predecessors, he
wrote to a friend:
"What is the difference whether it is in a wife or
a mother, it is still Eve the temptress that we must beware of in
any woman......I fail to see what use woman can be to man, if one
excludes the function of bearing children."
Centuries later, St. Thomas Aquinas still considered women as
defective:
"As regards the individual nature, woman is
defective and misbegotten, for the active force in the male seed
tends to the production of a perfect likeness in the masculine
sex; while the production of woman comes from a defect in the
active force or from some material indisposition, or even from
some external influence."
Finally, the renowned reformer Martin Luther could not see any
benefit from a woman but bringing into the world as many children
as possible regardless of any side effects:
"If they become tired or even die, that does not
matter. Let them die in childbirth, that's why they are there"
Again and again all women are denigrated because of the image of
Eve the temptress, thanks to the Genesis account. To sum up, the
Judaeo-Christian conception of women has been poisoned by the
belief in the sinful nature of Eve and her female offspring.
If
we now turn our attention to what the Quran has to say about
women, we will soon realize that the Islamic conception of women
is radically different from the Judaeo-Christian one. Let the
Quran speak for itself:
"For Muslim men and women, for believing men and
women, for devout men and women, for true men and women, for men
and women who are patient, for men and women who humble
themselves, for men and women who give in charity, for men and
women who fast, for men and women who guard their chastity, and
for men and women who engage much in Allah's praise-- For them all
has Allah prepared forgiveness and great reward" (33:35).
"The believers, men and women, are protectors, one
of another: they enjoin what is just, and forbid what is evil,
they observe regular prayers, practise regular charity, and obey
Allah and His Messenger. On them will Allah pour His Mercy: for
Allah is Exalted in power, Wise" (9:71).
"And their Lord answered them: Truly I will never
cause to be lost the work of any of you, Be you a male or female,
you are members one of another" (3:195).
"Whoever works evil will not be requited but by the
like thereof, and whoever works a righteous deed -whether man or
woman- and is a believer- such will enter the Garden of bliss"
(40:40).
"Whoever works righteousness, man or woman, and has
faith, verily to him/her we will give a new life that is good and
pure, and we will bestow on such their reward according to the
best of their actions" (16:97).
It
is clear that the Quranic view of women is no different than that
of men. They, both, are God's creatures whose sublime goal on
earth is to worship their Lord, do righteous deeds, and avoid evil
and they, both, will be assessed accordingly. The Quran never
mentions that the woman is the devil's gateway or that she is a
deceiver by nature. The Quran, also, never mentions that man is
God's image; all men and all women are his creatures, that is all.
According to the Quran, a woman's role on earth is not limited
only to childbirth. She is required to do as many good deeds as
any other man is required to do. The Quran never says that no
upright women have ever existed. To the contrary, the Quran has
instructed all the believers, women as well as men, to follow the
example of those ideal women such as the Virgin Mary and the
Pharoah's wife:
"And Allah sets forth, As an example to those who
believe, the wife of Pharaoh: Behold she said: 'O my lord build
for me, in nearness to you, a mansion in the Garden, and save me
from Pharaoh and his doings and save me from those who do wrong.'
And Mary the daughter of Imran who guarded her chastity and We
breathed into her body of Our spirit; and she testified to the
truth of the words of her Lord and of His revelations and was one
of the devout" (66:11-13).
4. SHAMEFUL DAUGHTERS ?
In
fact, the difference between the Biblical and the Quranic attitude
towards the female sex starts as soon as a female is born. For
example, the Bible states that the period of the mother's ritual
impurity is twice as long if a girl is born than if a boy is (Lev.
12:2-5). The Catholic Bible states explicitly that:
"The birth of a daughter is a loss" (Ecclesiasticus
22:3).
In
contrast to this shocking statement, boys receive special praise:
"A man who educates his son will be the envy of his
enemy." (Ecclesiasticus 30:3)
Jewish Rabbis made it an obligation on Jewish men to produce
offspring in order to propagate the race. At the same time, they
did not hide their clear preference for male children : "It is
well for those whose children are male but ill for those whose are
female", "At the birth of a boy, all are joyful...at the birth of
a girl all are sorrowful", and "When a boy comes into the world,
peace comes into the world... When a girl comes, nothing comes."[7]
A
daughter is considered a painful burden, a potential source of
shame to her father:
"Your daughter is headstrong? Keep a sharp look-out
that she does not make you the laughing stock of your enemies, the
talk of the town, the object of common gossip, and put you to
public shame" (Ecclesiasticus 42:11).
"Keep a headstrong daughter under firm control, or
she will abuse any indulgence she receives. Keep a strict watch on
her shameless eye, do not be surprised if she disgraces you" (Ecclesiasticus
26:10-11).
It
was this very same idea of treating daughters as sources of shame
that led the pagan Arabs, before the advent of Islam, to practice
female infanticide. The Quran severely condemned this heinous
practice:
"When news is brought to one of them of the birth
of a female child, his face darkens and he is filled with inward
grief. With shame does he hide himself from his people because of
the bad news he has had! Shall he retain her on contempt or bury
her in the dust? Ah! what an evil they decide on?" (16:59).
It
has to be mentioned that this sinister crime would have never
stopped in Arabia were it not for the power of the scathing terms
the Quran used to condemn this practice (16:59, 43:17, 81:8-9).
The Quran, moreover, makes no distinction between boys and girls.
In contrast to the Bible, the Quran considers the birth of a
female as a gift and a blessing from God, the same as the birth of
a male. The Quran even mentions the gift of the female birth
first:
" To Allah belongs the dominion of the heavens and
the earth. He creates what He wills. He bestows female children to
whomever He wills and bestows male children to whomever He wills"
(42:49).
In
order to wipe out all the traces of female infanticide in the
nascent Muslim society, Prophet Muhammad promised those who were
blessed with daughters of a great reward if they would bring them
up kindly:
"He who is involved in bringing up daughters, and
accords benevolent treatment towards them, they will be protection
for him against Hell-Fire" (Bukhari and Muslim).
"Whoever maintains two girls till they attain
maturity, he and I will come on the Resurrection Day like this;
and he joined his fingers" (Muslim).
5. FEMALE EDUCATION ?
The difference between the Biblical and the Quranic conceptions of
women is not limited to the newly born female, it extends far
beyond that. Let us compare their attitudes towards a female
trying to learn her religion. The heart of Judaism is the Torah,
the law. However, according to the Talmud, "women are exempt from
the study of the Torah." Some Jewish Rabbis firmly declared "Let
the words of Torah rather be destroyed by fire than imparted to
women", and "Whoever teaches his daughter Torah is as though he
taught her obscenity"[8]
The attitude of St. Paul in the New Testament is not brighter:
"As in all the congregations of the saints, women
should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to
speak, but must be in submission as the law says. If they want to
inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at
home; for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in the church."
(I Corinthians 14:34-35)
How can a woman learn if she is not allowed to speak? How can a
woman grow intellectually if she is obliged to be in a state of
full submission? How can she broaden her horizons if her one and
only source of information is her husband at home?
Now, to be fair, we should ask: is the Quranic position any
different? One short story narrated in the Quran sums its position
up concisely. Khawlah was a Muslim woman whose husband Aws
pronounced this statement at a moment of anger: "You are to me as
the back of my mother." This was held by pagan Arabs to be a
statement of divorce which freed the husband from any conjugal
responsibility but did not leave the wife free to leave the
husband's home or to marry another man. Having heard these words
from her husband, Khawlah was in a miserable situation. She went
straight to the Prophet of Islam to plead her case. The Prophet
was of the opinion that she should be patient since there seemed
to be no way out. Khawla kept arguing with the Prophet in an
attempt to save her suspended marriage. Shortly, the Quran
intervened; Khawla's plea was accepted. The divine verdict
abolished this iniquitous custom. One full chapter (Chapter 58) of
the Quran whose title is "Almujadilah" or "The woman who is
arguing" was named after this incident:
"Allah has heard and accepted the statement of the
woman who pleads with you (the Prophet) concerning her husband and
carries her complaint to Allah, and Allah hears the arguments
between both of you for Allah hears and sees all things...."
(58:1).
A
woman in the Quranic conception has the right to argue even with
the Prophet of Islam himself. No one has the right to instruct her
to be silent. She is under no obligation to consider her husband
the one and only reference in matters of law and religion.
6. UNCLEAN IMPURE WOMAN ?
Jewish laws and regulations concerning menstruating women are
extremely restrictive. The Old Testament considers any
menstruating woman as unclean and impure. Moreover, her impurity
"infects" others as well. Anyone or anything she touches becomes
unclean for a day:
"When a woman has her regular flow of blood, the
impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone
who touches her will be unclean till evening. Anything she lies on
during her period will be unclean, and anything she sits on will
be unclean. Whoever touches her bed must wash his clothes and
bathe with water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whoever
touches anything she sits on must wash his clothes and bathe with
water, and he will be unclean till evening. Whether it is the bed
or anything she was sitting on, when anyone touches it, he will be
unclean till evening" (Lev. 15:19-23).
Due to her "contaminating" nature, a menstruating woman was
sometimes "banished" in order to avoid any possibility of any
contact with her. She was sent to a special house called "the
house of uncleanness" for the whole period of her impurity.
[9] The Talmud considers a menstruating woman "fatal" even
without any physical contact:
"Our Rabbis taught:....if a menstruant woman passes
between two (men), if it is at the beginning of her menses she
will slay one of them, and if it is at the end of her menses she
will cause strife between them" (bPes. 111a.)
Furthermore, the husband of a menstruous woman was forbidden to
enter the synagogue if he had been made unclean by her even by the
dust under her feet. A priest whose wife, daughter, or mother was
menstruating could not recite priestly blessing in the synagogue.
[10] No wonder many Jewish women still refer to menstruation
as "the curse."
[11]
Islam does not consider a menstruating woman to possess any kind
of "contagious uncleanness". She is neither "untouchable" nor
"cursed." She practises her normal life with only one restriction:
A married couple are not allowed to have sexual intercourse during
the period of menstruation. Any other physical contact between
them is permissible. A menstruating woman is exempted from some
rituals such as daily prayers and fasting during her period.
7. BEARING WITNESS
Another issue in which the Quran and the Bible disagree is the
issue of women bearing witness. It is true that the Quran has
instructed the believers dealing in financial transactions to get
two male witnesses or one male and two females (2:282). However,
it is also true that the Quran in other situations accepts the
testimony of a woman as equal to that of a man. In fact the
woman's testimony can even invalidate the man's. If a man accuses
his wife of unchastity, he is required by the Quran to solemnly
swear five times as evidence of the wife's guilt. If the wife
denies and swears similarly five times, she is not considered
guilty and in either case the marriage is dissolved (24:6-11).
On
the other hand, women were not allowed to bear witness in early
Jewish society.
[12] The Rabbis counted women's not being able to bear witness
among the nine curses inflicted upon all women because of the Fall
(see the "Eve's Legacy" section). Women in today's Israel are not
allowed to give evidence in Rabbinical courts.
[13] The Rabbis justify why women cannot bear witness by
citing Genesis 18:9-16, where it is stated that Sara, Abraham's
wife had lied. The Rabbis use this incident as evidence that women
are unqualified to bear witness. It should be noted here that this
story narrated in Genesis 18:9-16 has been mentioned more than
once in the Quran without any hint of any lies by Sara (11:69-74,
51:24-30). In the Christian West, both ecclesiastical and civil
law debarred women from giving testimony until late last century.
[14]
If
a man accuses his wife of unchastity, her testimony will not be
considered at all according to the Bible. The accused wife has to
be subjected to a trial by ordeal. In this trial, the wife faces a
complex and humiliating ritual which was supposed to prove her
guilt or innocence (Num. 5:11-31). If she is found guilty after
this ordeal, she will be sentenced to death. If she is found not
guilty, her husband will be innocent of any wrongdoing.
Besides, if a man takes a woman as a wife and then accuses her of
not being a virgin, her own testimony will not count. Her parents
had to bring evidence of her virginity before the elders of the
town. If the parents could not prove the innocence of their
daughter, she would be stoned to death on her father's doorsteps.
If the parents were able to prove her innocence, the husband would
only be fined one hundred shekels of silver and he could not
divorce his wife as long as he lived:
"If a man takes a wife and, after lying with her,
dislikes her and slanders her and gives her a bad name, saying, 'I
married this woman, but when I approached her, I did not find
proof of her virginity,' then the girl's father and mother shall
bring proof that she was a virgin to the town elders at the gate.
The girl's father will say to the elders, 'I gave my daughter in
marriage to this man, but he dislikes her. Now he has slandered
her and said I did not find your daughter to be a virgin. But here
is the proof of my daughter's virginity.' Then her parents shall
display the cloth before the elders of the town, and the elders
shall take the man and punish him. They shall fine him a hundred
shekels of silver and give them to the girl's father, because this
man has given an Israelite virgin a bad name. She shall continue
to be his wife; he must not divorce her as long as he lives. If,
however, the charge is true and no proof of the girl's virginity
can be found, she shall be brought to the door of her father's
house and there the men of the town shall stone her to death. She
has done a disgraceful thing in Israel by being promiscuous while
still in her father's house. You must purge the evil from among
you." (Deuteronomy 22:13-21)
8. ADULTERY
Adultery is considered a sin in all religions. The Bible decrees
the death sentence for both the adulterer and the adulteress (Lev.
20:10). Islam also equally punishes both the adulterer and the
adulteress (24:2). However, the Quranic definition of adultery is
very different from the Biblical definition. Adultery, according
to the Quran, is the involvement of a married man or a married
woman in an extramarital affair. The Bible only considers the
extramarital affair of a married woman as adultery (Leviticus
20:10, Deuteronomy 22:22, Proverbs 6:20-7:27).
"If a man is found sleeping with another man's
wife, both the man who slept with her and the woman must die. You
must purge the evil from Israel" (Deut. 22:22).
"If a man commits adultery with another man's wife
both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death" (Lev.
20:10).
According to the Biblical definition, if a married man sleeps with
an unmarried woman, this is not considered a crime at all. The
married man who has extramarital affairs with unmarried women is
not an adulterer and the unmarried women involved with him are not
adulteresses. The crime of adultery is committed only when a man,
whether married or single, sleeps with a married woman. In this
case the man is considered adulterer, even if he is not married,
and the woman is considered adulteress. In short, adultery is any
illicit sexual intercourse involving a married woman. The
extramarital affair of a married man is not per se a crime in the
Bible. Why is the dual moral standard? According to Encyclopaedia
Judaica, the wife was considered to be the husband's possession
and adultery constituted a violation of the husband's exclusive
right to her; the wife as the husband's possession had no such
right to him.
[15] That is, if a man had sexual intercourse with a married
woman, he would be violating the property of another man and,
thus, he should be punished.
To
the present day in Israel, if a married man indulges in an
extramarital affair with an unmarried woman, his children by that
woman are considered legitimate. But, if a married woman has an
affair with another man, whether married or not married, her
children by that man are not only illegitimate but they are
considered bastards and are forbidden to marry any other Jews
except converts and other bastards. This ban is handed down to the
children's descendants for 10 generations until the taint of
adultery is presumably weakened.
[16]
The Quran, on the other hand, never considers any woman to be the
possession of any man. The Quran eloquently describes the
relationship between the spouses by saying:
" And among His signs is that He created for you
mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquillity
with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts:
verily in that are signs for those who reflect" (30:21).
This is the Quranic conception of marriage: love, mercy, and
tranquillity, not possession and double standards.
9. VOWS
According to the Bible, a man must fulfil any vows he might make
to God. He must not break his word. On the other hand, a woman's
vow is not necessarily binding on her. It has to be approved by
her father, if she is living in his house, or by her husband, if
she is married. If a father/husband does not endorse his
daughter's/wife's vows, all pledges made by her become null and
void:
"But if her father forbids her when he hears about
it, none of her vows or the pledges by which she obligated herself
will stand ....Her husband may confirm or nullify any vow she
makes or any sworn pledge to deny herself" (Num. 30:2-15)
Why is it that a woman's word is not binding per se ? The answer
is simple: because she is owned by her father, before marriage, or
by her husband after marriage. The father's control over his
daughter was absolute to the extent that, should he wish, he could
sell her! It is indicated in the writings of the Rabbis that: "The
man may sell his daughter, but the woman may not sell her
daughter; the man may betroth his daughter, but the woman may not
betroth her daughter."
[17] The Rabbinic literature also indicates that marriage
represents the transfer of control from the father to the husband:
"betrothal, making a woman the sacrosanct possession--the
inviolable property-- of the husband..." Obviously, if the woman
is considered to be the property of someone else, she cannot make
any pledges that her owner does not approve of.
It
is of interest to note that this Biblical instruction concerning
women's vows has had negative repercussions on Judaeo-Christian
women till early in this century. A married woman in the Western
world had no legal status. No act of hers was of any legal value.
Her husband could repudiate any contract, bargain, or deal she had
made. Women in the West (the largest heir of the Judaeo-Christian
legacy) were held unable to make a binding contract because they
were practically owned by someone else. Western women had suffered
for almost two thousand years because of the Biblical attitude
towards women's position vis-à-vis their fathers and husbands.
[18]
In
Islam, the vow of every Muslim, male or female, is binding on
him/her. No one has the power to repudiate the pledges of anyone
else. Failure to keep a solemn oath, made by a man or a woman, has
to be expiated as indicated in the Quran:
"He [God] will call you to account for your
deliberate oaths: for expiation, feed ten indigent persons, on a
scale of the average for the food of your families; Or clothe
them; or give a slave his freedom. If that is beyond your means,
fast for three days. That is the expiation for the oaths you have
sworn. But keep your oaths" (5:89).
Companions of the Prophet Muhammad, men and women, used to present
their oath of allegiance to him personally. Women, as well as men,
would independently come to him and pledge their oaths:
"O Prophet, When believing women come to you to
make a covenant with you that they will not associate in worship
anything with God, nor steal, nor fornicate, nor kill their own
children, nor slander anyone, nor disobey you in any just matter,
then make a covenant with them and pray to God for the forgiveness
of their sins. Indeed God is Forgiving and most Merciful" (60:12).
A
man could not swear the oath on behalf of his daughter or his
wife. Nor could a man repudiate the oath made by any of his female
relatives.
10. WIFE'S PROPERTY ?
The three religions share an unshakeable belief in the importance
of marriage and family life. They also agree on the leadership of
the husband over the family. Nevertheless, blatant differences do
exist among the three religions with respect to the limits of this
leadership. The Judaeo-Christian tradition, unlike Islam,
virtually extends the leadership of the husband into ownership of
his wife.
The Jewish tradition regarding the husband's role towards his wife
stems from the conception that he owns her as he owns his slave.
[19] This conception has been the reason behind the double
standard in the laws of adultery and behind the husband's ability
to annul his wife's vows. This conception has also been
responsible for denying the wife any control over her property or
her earnings. As soon as a Jewish woman got married, she
completely lost any control over her property and earnings to her
husband. Jewish Rabbis asserted the husband's right to his wife's
property as a corollary of his possession of her: "Since one has
come into the possession of the woman does it not follow that he
should come into the possession of her property too?", and "Since
he has acquired the woman should he not acquire also her
property?"
[20] Thus, marriage caused the richest woman to become
practically penniless. The Talmud describes the financial
situation of a wife as follows:
"How can a woman have anything; whatever is hers
belongs to her husband? What is his is his and what is hers is
also his...... Her earnings and what she may find in the streets
are also his. The household articles, even the crumbs of bread on
the table, are his. Should she invite a guest to her house and
feed him, she would be stealing from her husband..." (San. 71a,
Git. 62a)
The fact of the matter is that the property of a Jewish female was
meant to attract suitors. A Jewish family would assign their
daughter a share of her father's estate to be used as a dowry in
case of marriage. It was this dowry that made Jewish daughters an
unwelcome burden to their fathers. The father had to raise his
daughter for years and then prepare for her marriage by providing
a large dowry. Thus, a girl in a Jewish family was a liability and
no asset.
[21] This liability explains why the birth of a daughter was
not celebrated with joy in the old Jewish society (see the
"Shameful Daughters?" section). The dowry was the wedding gift
presented to the groom under terms of tenancy. The husband would
act as the practical owner of the dowry but he could not sell it.
The bride would lose any control over the dowry at the moment of
marriage. Moreover, she was expected to work after marriage and
all her earnings had to go to her husband in return for her
maintenance which was his obligation. She could regain her
property only in two cases: divorce or her husband's death. Should
she die first, he would inherit her property. In the case of the
husband's death, the wife could regain her pre-marital property
but she was not entitled to inherit any share in her deceased
husband's own property. It has to be added that the groom also had
to present a marriage gift to his bride, yet again he was the
practical owner of this gift as long as they were married.
[22]
Christianity, until recently, has followed the same Jewish
tradition. Both religious and civil authorities in the Christian
Roman Empire (after Constantine) required a property agreement as
a condition for recognizing the marriage. Families offered their
daughters increasing dowries and, as a result, men tended to marry
earlier while families postponed their daughters' marriages until
later than had been customary.
[23] Under Canon law, a wife was entitled to restitution of
her dowry if the marriage was annulled unless she was guilty of
adultery. In this case, she forfeited her right to the dowry which
remained in her husband's hands.
[24] Under Canon and civil law a married woman in Christian
Europe and America had lost her property rights until late
nineteenth and early twentieth centuries. For example, women's
rights under English law were compiled and published in 1632.
These 'rights' included: "That which the husband hath is his own.
That which the wife hath is the husband's."
[25] The wife not only lost her property upon marriage, she
lost her personality as well. No act of her was of legal value.
Her husband could repudiate any sale or gift made by her as being
of no binding legal value. The person with whom she had any
contract was held as a criminal for participating in a fraud.
Moreover, she could not sue or be sued in her own name, nor could
she sue her own husband.
[26] A married woman was practically treated as an infant in
the eyes of the law. The wife simply belonged to her husband and
therefore she lost her property, her legal personality, and her
family name.
[27]
Islam, since the seventh century C.E., has granted married women
the independent personality which the Judaeo-Christian West had
deprived them until very recently. In Islam, the bride and her
family are under no obligation whatsoever to present a gift to the
groom. The girl in a Muslim family is no liability. A woman is so
dignified by Islam that she does not need to present gifts in
order to attract potential husbands. It is the groom who must
present the bride with a marriage gift. This gift is considered
her property and neither the groom nor the bride's family have any
share in or control over it. In some Muslim societies today, a
marriage gift of a hundred thousand dollars in diamonds is not
unusual.
[28] The bride retains her marriage gifts even if she is later
divorced. The husband is not allowed any share in his wife's
property except what she offers him with her free consent.
[29] The Quran has stated its position on this issue quite
clearly:
"And give the women (on marriage) their dower as a
free gift; but if they, Of their own good pleasure, remit any part
of it to you, take it and enjoy it with right good cheer" (4:4)
The wife's property and earnings are under her full control and
for her use alone since her, and the children's, maintenance is
her husband's responsibility.
[30] No matter how rich the wife might be, she is not obliged
to act as a co-provider for the family unless she herself
voluntarily chooses to do so. Spouses do inherit from one another.
Moreover, a married woman in Islam retains her independent legal
personality and her family name.
[31] An American judge once commented on the rights of Muslim
women saying: " A Muslim girl may marry ten times, but her
individuality is not absorbed by that of her various husbands. She
is a solar planet with a name and legal personality of her own."
[32]
11. DIVORCE
The three religions have remarkable differences in their attitudes
towards divorce. Christianity abhors divorce altogether. The New
Testament unequivocally advocates the indissolubility of marriage.
It is attributed to Jesus to have said, "But I tell you that
anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness,
causes her to become adulteress, and anyone who marries the
divorced woman commits adultery" (Matthew 5:32). This
uncompromising ideal is, without a doubt, unrealistic. It assumes
a state of moral perfection that human societies have never
achieved. When a couple realizes that their married life is beyond
repair, a ban on divorce will not do them any good. Forcing
ill-mated couples to remain together against their wills is
neither effective nor reasonable. No wonder the whole Christian
world has been obliged to sanction divorce.
Judaism, on the other hand, allows divorce even without any cause.
The Old Testament gives the husband the right to divorce his wife
even if he just dislikes her:
"If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing
to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he
writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her
from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the
wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and
writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her
from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who
divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been
defiled" (Deut. 24:1-4).
The above verses have caused some considerable debate among Jewish
scholars because of their disagreement over the interpretation of
the words "displeasing", "indecency", and "dislikes" mentioned in
the verses. The Talmud records their different opinions:
"The school of Shammai held that a man should not
divorce his wife unless he has found her guilty of some sexual
misconduct, while the school of Hillel say he may divorce her even
if she has merely spoiled a dish for him. Rabbi Akiba says he may
divorce her even if he simply finds another woman more beautiful
than she" (Gittin 90a-b).
The New Testament follows the Shammaites opinion while Jewish law
has followed the opinion of the Hillelites and R. Akiba.
{33] Since the Hillelites view prevailed, it became the
unbroken tradition of Jewish law to give the husband freedom to
divorce his wife without any cause at all. The Old Testament not
only gives the husband the right to divorce his "displeasing"
wife, it considers divorcing a "bad wife" an obligation:
"A bad wife brings humiliation, downcast looks, and
a wounded heart. Slack of hand and weak of knee is the man whose
wife fails to make him happy. Woman is the origin of sin, and it
is through her that we all die. Do not leave a leaky cistern to
drip or allow a bad wife to say what she likes. If she does not
accept your control, divorce her and send her away" (Ecclesiasticus
25:25).
The Talmud has recorded several specific actions by wives which
obliged their husbands to divorce them: "If she ate in the street,
if she drank greedily in the street, if she suckled in the street,
in every case Rabbi Meir says that she must leave her husband" (Git.
89a). The Talmud has also made it mandatory to divorce a barren
wife (who bore no children in a period of ten years): "Our Rabbis
taught: If a man took a wife and lived with her for ten years and
she bore no child, he shall divorce her" (Yeb. 64a).
Wives, on the other hand, cannot initiate divorce under Jewish
law. A Jewish wife, however, could claim the right to a divorce
before a Jewish court provided that a strong reason exists. Very
few grounds are provided for the wife to make a claim for a
divorce. These grounds include: A husband with physical defects or
skin disease, a husband not fulfilling his conjugal
responsibilities, etc. The Court might support the wife's
claim to a divorce but it cannot dissolve the marriage. Only the
husband can dissolve the marriage by giving his wife a bill of
divorce. The Court could scourge, fine, imprison, and
excommunicate him to force him to deliver the necessary bill of
divorce to his wife. However, if the husband is stubborn enough,
he can refuse to grant his wife a divorce and keep her tied to him
indefinitely. Worse still, he can desert her without granting her
a divorce and leave her unmarried and undivorced. He can marry
another woman or even live with any single woman out of wedlock
and have children from her (these children are considered
legitimate under Jewish law). The deserted wife, on the other
hand, cannot marry any other man since she is still legally
married and she cannot live with any other man because she will be
considered an adulteress and her children from this union will be
illegitimate for ten generations. A woman in such a position is
called an agunah (chained woman).
[34] In the United States today there are approximately 1000
to 1500 Jewish women who are agunot (plural for agunah), while in
Israel their number might be as high as 16000. Husbands may extort
thousands of dollars from their trapped wives in exchange for a
Jewish divorce.
[35]
Islam occupies the middle ground between Christianity and Judaism
with respect to divorce. Marriage in Islam is a sanctified bond
that should not be broken except for compelling reasons. Couples
are instructed to pursue all possible remedies whenever their
marriages are in danger. Divorce is not to be resorted to except
when there is no other way out. In a nutshell, Islam recognizes
divorce, yet it discourages it by all means. Let us focus on the
recognition side first. Islam does recognize the right of both
partners to end their matrimonial relationship. Islam gives the
husband the right for Talaq (divorce). Moreover, Islam, unlike
Judaism, grants the wife the right to dissolve the marriage
through what is known as Khula'.
[36] If the husband dissolves the marriage by divorcing his
wife, he cannot retrieve any of the marriage gifts he has given
her. The Quran explicitly prohibits the divorcing husbands from
taking back their marriage gifts no matter how expensive or
valuable these gifts might be:
"But if you decide to take one wife in place of
another, even if you had given the latter a whole treasure for
dower, take not the least bit of it back; Would you take it by
slander and a manifest wrong?" (4:20).
In
the case of the wife choosing to end the marriage, she may return
the marriage gifts to her husband. Returning the marriage gifts in
this case is a fair compensation for the husband who is keen to
keep his wife while she chooses to leave him. The Quran has
instructed Muslim men not to take back any of the gifts they have
given to their wives except in the case of the wife choosing to
dissolve the marriage:
"It is not lawful for you (Men) to take back any of
your gifts except when both parties fear that they would be unable
to keep the limits ordained by Allah. There is no blame on either
of them if she give something for her freedom. These are the
limits ordained by Allah so do not transgress them" (2:229).
Also, a woman came to the Prophet Muhammad seeking the dissolution
of her marriage, she told the Prophet that she did not have any
complaints against her husband's character or manners. Her only
problem was that she honestly did not like him to the extent of
not being able to live with him any longer. The Prophet asked her:
"Would you give him his garden (the marriage gift he had given
her) back?" she said: "Yes". The Prophet then instructed the man
to take back his garden and accept the dissolution of the marriage
(Bukhari).
In
some cases, A Muslim wife might be willing to keep her marriage
but find herself obliged to claim for a divorce because of some
compelling reasons such as: Cruelty of the husband, desertion
without a reason, a husband not fulfilling his conjugal
responsibilities, etc. In these cases the Muslim court
dissolves the marriage.
[37]
In
short, Islam has offered the Muslim woman some unequalled rights:
she can end the marriage through Khula' and she can sue for a
divorce. A Muslim wife can never become chained by a recalcitrant
husband. It was these rights that enticed Jewish women who lived
in the early Islamic societies of the seventh century C.E. to seek
to obtain bills of divorce from their Jewish husbands in Muslim
courts. The Rabbis declared these bills null and void. In order to
end this practice, the Rabbis gave new rights and privileges to
Jewish women in an attempt to weaken the appeal of the Muslim
courts. Jewish women living in Christian countries were not
offered any similar privileges since the Roman law of divorce
practiced there was no more attractive than the Jewish law.
[38]
Let us now focus our attention on how Islam discourages divorce.
The Prophet of Islam told the believers that:
"among all the permitted acts, divorce is the most
hateful to God" (Abu Dawood).
A
Muslim man should not divorce his wife just because he dislikes
her. The Quran instructs Muslim men to be kind to their wives even
in cases of lukewarm emotions or feelings of dislike:
"Live with them (your wives) on a footing of
kindness and equity. If you dislike them it may be that you
dislike something in which Allah has placed a great deal of good"
(4:19).
Prophet Muhammad gave a similar instruction:
" A believing man must not hate a believing woman.
If he dislikes one of her traits he will be pleased with another"
(Muslim).
The Prophet has also emphasized that the best Muslims are those
who are best to their wives:
"The believers who show the most perfect faith are
those who have the best character and the best of you are those
who are best to their wives" (Tirmidthi).
However, Islam is a practical religion and it does recognize that
there are circumstances in which a marriage becomes on the verge
of collapsing. In such cases, a mere advice of kindness or self
restraint is no viable solution. So, what to do in order to save a
marriage in these cases? The Quran offers some practical advice
for the spouse (husband or wife) whose partner (wife or husband)
is the wrongdoer. For the husband whose wife's ill-conduct is
threatening the marriage, the Quran gives four types of advice as
detailed in the following verses:
"As to those women on whose part you fear
disloyalty and ill-conduct, (1) Admonish them, (2) refuse to share
their beds, (3) beat them; but if they return to obedience seek
not against them means of annoyance: For Allah is Most High,
Great. (4) If you fear a break between them, appoint two arbiters,
one from his family and the other from hers; If they wish for
peace, Allah will cause their reconciliation" (4:34-35).
The first three are to be tried first. If they fail, then the help
of the families concerned should be sought. It has to be noted, in
the light of the above verses, that beating the rebellious wife is
a temporary measure that is resorted to as third in line in cases
of extreme necessity in hopes that it might remedy the wrongdoing
of the wife. If it does, the husband is not allowed by any means
to continue any annoyance to the wife as explicitly mentioned in
the verse. If it does not, the husband is still not allowed to use
this measure any longer and the final avenue of the
family-assisted reconciliation has to be explored.
Prophet Muhammad has instructed Muslim husbands that they should
not have recourse to these measures except in extreme cases such
as open lewdness committed by the wife. Even in these cases the
punishment should be slight and if the wife desists, the husband
is not permitted to irritate her:
"In case they are guilty of open lewdness you may
leave them alone in their beds and inflict slight punishment. If
they are obedient to you, do not seek against them any means of
annoyance" (Tirmidthi)
Furthermore, the Prophet of Islam has condemned any unjustifiable
beating. Some Muslim wives complained to him that their husbands
had beaten them. Hearing that, the Prophet categorically stated
that:
"Those who do so (beat their wives) are not the
best among you" (Abu Dawood).
It
has to be remembered at this point that the Prophet has also said:
"The best of you is he who is best to his family,
and I am the best among you to my family" (Tirmidthi).
The Prophet advised one Muslim woman, whose name was Fatimah bint
Qais, not to marry a man because the man was known for beating
women:
"I went to the Prophet and said: Abul Jahm and
Mu'awiah have proposed to marry me. The Prophet (by way of advice)
said: As to Mu'awiah he is very poor and Abul Jahm is accustomed
to beating women" (Muslim).
It
has to be noted that the Talmud sanctions wife beating as
chastisement for the purpose of discipline.
[39] The husband is not restricted to the extreme cases such
as those of open lewdness. He is allowed to beat his wife even if
she just refuses to do her house work. Moreover, he is not limited
only to the use of light punishment. He is permitted to break his
wife's stubbornness by the lash or by starving her.
[40]
For the wife whose husband's ill-conduct is the cause for the
marriage's near collapse, the Quran offers the following advice:
"If a wife fears cruelty or desertion on her
husband's part, there is no blame on them if they arrange an
amicable settlement between themselves; and such settlement is
best" (4:128).
In
this case, the wife is advised to seek reconciliation with her
husband (with or without family assistance). It is notable that
the Quran is not advising the wife to resort to the two measures
of abstention from sex and beating. The reason for this disparity
might be to protect the wife from a violent physical reaction by
her already misbehaving husband. Such a violent physical reaction
will do both the wife and the marriage more harm than good. Some
Muslim scholars have suggested that the court can apply these
measures against the husband on the wife's behalf. That is, the
court first admonishes the rebellious husband, then forbids him
his wife's bed, and finally executes a symbolic beating.
[41]
To
sum up, Islam offers Muslim married couples much viable advice to
save their marriages in cases of trouble and tension. If one of
the partners is jeopardizing the matrimonial relationship, the
other partner is advised by the Quran to do whatever possible and
effective in order to save this sacred bond. If all the measures
fail, Islam allows the partners to separate peacefully and
amicably.
12. MOTHERS
The Old Testament in several places commands kind and considerate
treatment of the parents and condemns those who dishonor them. For
example, "If anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to
death" (Lev. 20:9) and "A wise man brings joy to his father but a
foolish man despises his mother" (Proverbs 15:20). Although
honoring the father alone is mentioned in some places, e.g. "A
wise man heeds his father's instruction" (Proverbs 13:1), the
mother alone is never mentioned. Moreover, there is no special
emphasis on treating the mother kindly as a sign of appreciation
of her great suffering in childbearing and suckling. Besides,
mothers do not inherit at all from their children while fathers
do.
[42]
It
is difficult to speak of the New Testament as a scripture that
calls for honoring the mother. To the contrary, one gets the
impression that the New Testament considers kind treatment of
mothers as an impediment on the way to God. According to the New
Testament, one cannot become a good Christian worthy of becoming a
disciple of Christ unless he hates his mother. It is attributed to
Jesus to have said:
"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father
and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters--yes,
even his own life--he can not be my disciple" (Luke 14:26).
Furthermore, the New Testament depicts a picture of Jesus as
indifferent to, or even disrespectful of, his own mother. For
example, when she had come looking for him while he was preaching
to a crowd, he did not care to go out to see her:
"Then Jesus' mother and brothers arrived. Standing
outside, they sent someone to call him. A crowd was sitting around
him and they told him, 'Your mother and brothers are outside
looking for you.' 'Who are my mother and my brothers?' he asked.
Then he looked at those seated in a circle around him and said,'
Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God's will is my
brother and sister and mother.' " (Mark 3:31-35)
One might argue that Jesus was trying to teach his audience an
important lesson that religious ties are no less important than
family ties. However, he could have taught his listeners the same
lesson without showing such absolute indifference to his mother.
The same disrespectful attitude is depicted when he refused to
endorse a statement made by a member of his audience blessing his
mother's role in giving birth to him and nursing him:
"As Jesus was saying these things, a woman in the
crowd called out, 'Blessed is the mother who gave you birth and
nursed you.' He replied, 'Blessed rather are those who hear the
word of God and obey it.' " (Luke 11:27-28)
If
a mother with the stature of the virgin Mary had been treated with
such discourtesy, as depicted in the New Testament, by a son of
the stature of Jesus Christ, then how should an average Christian
mother be treated by her average Christian sons?
In
Islam, the honor, respect, and esteem attached to motherhood is
unparalleled. The Quran places the importance of kindness to
parents as second only to worshipping God Almighty:
"Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but
Him, And that you be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them
attain old age in your life, Say not to them a word of contempt,
nor repel them, But address them in terms of honor. And out of
kindness, Lower to them the wing of humility, and say: 'My Lord!
bestow on them Your Mercy as they Cherished me in childhood' "
(17:23-24).
The Quran in several other places puts special emphasis on the
mother's great role in giving birth and nursing:
"And We have enjoined on man to be good to his
parents: In travail upon travail did his mother bear him and in
two years was his weaning. Show gratitude to Me and to your
parents" (31:14).
The very special place of mothers in Islam has been eloquently
described by Prophet Muhammad:
"A man asked the Prophet: 'Whom should I honor
most?' The Prophet replied: 'Your mother'. 'And who comes next?'
asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your mother'. 'And who comes
next?' asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your mother!'. 'And
who comes next?' asked the man. The Prophet replied: 'Your
father'" (Bukhari and Muslim).
Among the few precepts of Islam which Muslims still faithfully
observe to the present day is the considerate treatment of
mothers. The honor that Muslim mothers receive from their sons and
daughters is exemplary. The intensely warm relations between
Muslim mothers and their children and the deep respect with which
Muslim men approach their mothers usually amaze Westerners.
[43]
13. FEMALE INHERITANCE ?
One of the most important differences between the Quran and the
Bible is their attitude towards female inheritance of the property
of a deceased relative. The Biblical attitude has been succinctly
described by Rabbi Epstein: "The continuous and unbroken tradition
since the Biblical days gives the female members of the household,
wife and daughters, no right of succession to the family estate.
In the more primitive scheme of succession, the female members of
the family were considered part of the estate and as remote from
the legal personality of an heir as the slave. Whereas by Mosaic
enactment the daughters were admitted to succession in the event
of no male issue remained, the wife was not recognized as heir
even in such conditions."
[44] Why were the female members of the family considered part
of the family estate? Rabbi Epstein has the answer: "They are
owned --before marriage, by the father; after marriage, by the
husband."
[45]
The Biblical rules of inheritance are outlined in Numbers 27:1-11.
A wife is given no share in her husband's estate, while he is her
first heir, even before her sons. A daughter can inherit only if
no male heirs exist. A mother is not an heir at all while the
father is. Widows and daughters, in case male children remained,
were at the mercy of the male heirs for provision. That is why
widows and orphan girls were among the most destitute members of
the Jewish society.
Christianity has followed suit for long time. Both the
ecclesiastical and civil laws of Christendom barred daughters from
sharing with their brothers in the father's patrimony. Besides,
wives were deprived of any inheritance rights. These iniquitous
laws survived till late in the last century
[46].
Among the pagan Arabs before Islam, inheritance rights were
confined exclusively to the male relatives. The Quran abolished
all these unjust customs and gave all the female relatives
inheritance shares:
"From what is left by parents and those nearest
related there is a share for men and a share for women, whether
the property be small or large --a determinate share" (4:7).
Muslim mothers, wives, daughters, and sisters had received
inheritance rights thirteen hundred years before Europe recognized
that these rights even existed. The division of inheritance is a
vast subject with an enormous amount of details (4:7,11,12,176).
The general rule is that the female share is half the male's
except the cases in which the mother receives equal share to that
of the father. This general rule if taken in isolation from other
legislations concerning men and women may seem unfair. In order to
understand the rationale behind this rule, one must take into
account the fact that the financial obligations of men in Islam
far exceed those of women (see the "Wife's property?" section). A
bridegroom must provide his bride with a marriage gift. This gift
becomes her exclusive property and remains so even if she is later
divorced. The bride is under no obligation to present any gifts to
her groom. Moreover, the Muslim husband is charged with the
maintenance of his wife and children. The wife, on the other hand,
is not obliged to help him in this regard. Her property and
earnings are for her use alone except what she may voluntarily
offer her husband. Besides, one has to realize that Islam
vehemently advocates family life. It strongly encourages youth to
get married, discourages divorce, and does not regard celibacy as
a virtue. Therefore, in a truly Islamic society, family life is
the norm and single life is the rare exception. That is, almost
all marriage-aged women and men are married in an Islamic society.
In light of these facts, one would appreciate that Muslim men, in
general, have greater financial burdens than Muslim women and thus
inheritance rules are meant to offset this imbalance so that the
society lives free of all gender or class wars. After a simple
comparison between the financial rights and duties of Muslim
women, one British Muslim woman has concluded that Islam has
treated women not only fairly but generously.
[47]
14. PLIGHT OF WIDOWS
Because of the fact that the Old Testament recognized no
inheritance rights to them, widows were among the most vulnerable
of the Jewish population. The male relatives who inherited all of
a woman's deceased husband's estate were to provide for her from
that estate. However, widows had no way to ensure this provision
was carried out, and lived on the mercy of others. Therefore,
widows were among the lowest classes in ancient Israel and
widowhood was considered a symbol of great degradation (Isaiah
54:4). But the plight of a widow in the Biblical tradition
extended even beyond her exclusion from her husband's property.
According to Genesis 38, a childless widow must marry her
husband's brother, even if he is already married, so that he can
produce offspring for his dead brother, thus ensuring his
brother's name will not die out.
"Then Judah said to Onan, 'Lie with your brother's
wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to produce
offspring for your brother' " (Genesis 38:8).
The widow's consent to this marriage is not required. The widow is
treated as part of her deceased husband's property whose main
function is to ensure her husband's posterity. This Biblical law
is still practiced in today's Israel.
[48] A childless widow in Israel is bequeathed to her
husband's brother. If the brother is too young to marry, she has
to wait until he comes of age. Should the deceased husband's
brother refuse to marry her, she is set free and can then marry
any man of her choice. It is not an uncommon phenomenon in Israel
that widows are subjected to blackmail by their brothers-in-law in
order to gain their freedom.
The pagan Arabs before Islam had similar practices. A widow was
considered a part of her husband's property to be inherited by his
male heirs and she was, usually, given in marriage to the deceased
man's eldest son from another wife. The Quran scathingly attacked
and abolished this degrading custom:
"And marry not women whom your fathers
married--Except what is past-- it was shameful, odious, and
abominable custom indeed" (4:22).
Widows and divorced women were so looked down upon in the Biblical
tradition that the high priest could not marry a widow, a divorced
woman, or a prostitute:
"The woman he (the high priest) marries must be a
virgin. He must not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or a woman
defiled by prostitution, but only a virgin from his own people, so
he will not defile his offspring among his people" (Lev. 21:13-15)
In
Israel today, a descendant of the Cohen caste (the high priests of
the days of the Temple) cannot marry a divorcee, a widow, or a
prostitute.
[49] In the Jewish legislation, a woman who has been widowed
three times with all the three husbands dying of natural causes is
considered 'fatal' and forbidden to marry again.
[50] The Quran, on the other hand, recognizes neither castes
nor fatal persons. Widows and divorcees have the freedom to marry
whomever they choose. There is no stigma attached to divorce or
widowhood in the Quran:
"When you divorce women and they fulfil their terms
[three menstruation periods] either take them back on equitable
terms or set them free on equitable terms; But do not take them
back to injure them or to take undue advantage, If anyone does
that, he wrongs his own soul. Do not treat Allah's signs as a
jest" (2:231).
"If any of you die and leave widows behind, they
shall wait four months and ten days. When they have fulfilled
their term, there is no blame on you if they dispose of themselves
in a just manner" (2:234).
"Those of you who die and leave widows should
bequeath for their widows a year's maintenance and residence. But
if they [the widows] leave (the residence) there is no blame on
you for what they justly do with themselves" (2:240).
15. POLYGAMY
Let us now tackle the important question of polygamy. Polygamy is
a very ancient practice found in many human societies. The Bible
did not condemn polygamy. To the contrary, the Old Testament and
Rabbinic writings frequently attest to the legality of polygamy.
King Solomon is said to have had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1
Kings 11:3) Also, king David is said to have had many wives and
concubines (2 Samuel 5:13). The Old Testament does have some
injunctions on how to distribute the property of a man among his
sons from different wives (Deut. 22:7). The only restriction on
polygamy is a ban on taking a wife's sister as a rival wife (Lev.
18:18). The Talmud advises a maximum of four wives.
[51] European Jews continued to practice polygamy until the
sixteenth century. Oriental Jews regularly practiced polygamy
until they arrived in Israel where it is forbidden under civil
law. However, under religious law which overrides civil law in
such cases, it is permissible.
[52]
What about the New Testament? According to Father Eugene Hillman
in his insightful book, Polygamy reconsidered, "Nowhere in the New
Testament is there any explicit commandment that marriage should
be monogamous or any explicit commandment forbidding polygamy."
[53] Moreover, Jesus has not spoken against polygamy though it
was practiced by the Jews of his society. Father Hillman stresses
the fact that the Church in Rome banned polygamy in order to
conform to the Greco-Roman culture (which prescribed only one
legal wife while tolerating concubinage and prostitution). He
cited St. Augustine, "Now indeed in our time, and in keeping with
Roman custom, it is no longer allowed to take another wife."
[54] African churches and African Christians often remind
their European brothers that the Church's ban on polygamy is a
cultural tradition and not an authentic Christian injunction.
The Quran, too, allowed polygamy, but not without restrictions:
"If you fear that you shall not be able to deal
justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three
or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly
with them, then only one" (4:3).
The Quran, contrary to the Bible, limited the maximum number of
wives to four under the strict condition of treating the wives
equally and justly. It should not be understood that the Quran is
exhorting the believers to practice polygamy, or that polygamy is
considered as an ideal. In other words, the Quran has "tolerated"
or "allowed" polygamy, and no more, but why? Why is polygamy
permissible ? The answer is simple: there are places and times in
which there are compelling social and moral reasons for polygamy.
As the above Quranic verse indicates, the issue of polygamy in
Islam cannot be understood apart from community obligations
towards orphans and widows. Islam as a universal religion suitable
for all places and all times could not ignore these compelling
obligations.
In
most human societies, females outnumber males. In the U.S. there
are, at least, eight million more women than men. In a country
like Guinea there are 122 females for every 100 males. In
Tanzania, there are 95.1 males per 100 females.
[55] What should a society do towards such unbalanced sex
ratios? There are various solutions, some might suggest celibacy,
others would prefer female infanticide (which does happen in some
societies in the world today !). Others may think the only outlet
is that the society should tolerate all manners of sexual
permissiveness: prostitution, sex out of wedlock, homosexuality,
etc. For other societies , like most African societies today,
the most honorable outlet is to allow polygamous marriage as a
culturally accepted and socially respected institution. The point
that is often misunderstood in the West is that women in other
cultures do not necessarily look at polygamy as a sign of women's
degradation. For example, many young African brides , whether
Christians or Muslims or otherwise, would prefer to marry a
married man who has already proved himself to be a responsible
husband. Many African wives urge their husbands to get a second
wife so that they do not feel lonely.
[56] A survey of over six thousand women, ranging in age from
15 to 59, conducted in the second largest city in Nigeria showed
that 60 percent of these women would be pleased if their husbands
took another wife. Only 23 percent expressed anger at the idea of
sharing with another wife. Seventy-six percent of the women in a
survey conducted in Kenya viewed polygamy positively. In a survey
undertaken in rural Kenya, 25 out of 27 women considered polygamy
to be better than monogamy. These women felt polygamy can be a
happy and beneficial experience if the co-wives cooperate with
each other.
[57] Polygamy in most African societies is such a respectable
institution that some Protestant churches are becoming more
tolerant of it. A bishop of the Anglican Church in Kenya declared
that, "Although monogamy may be ideal for the expression of love
between husband and wife, the church should consider that in
certain cultures polygyny is socially acceptable and that the
belief that polygyny is contrary to Christianity is no longer
tenable."
[58] After a careful study of African polygamy, Reverend David
Gitari of the Anglican Church has concluded that polygamy, as
ideally practiced, is more Christian than divorce and remarriage
as far as the abandoned wives and children are concerned.
[59] I personally know of some highly educated African wives
who, despite having lived in the West for many years, do not have
any objections against polygamy. One of them, who lives in the
U.S., solemnly exhorts her husband to get a second wife to help
her in raising the kids.
The problem of the unbalanced sex ratios becomes truly problematic
at times of war. Native American Indian tribes used to suffer
highly unbalanced sex ratios after wartime losses. Women in these
tribes, who in fact enjoyed a fairly high status, accepted
polygamy as the best protection against indulgence in indecent
activities. European settlers, without offering any other
alternative, condemned this Indian polygamy as 'uncivilised'.
[60] After the second world war, there were 7,300,000 more
women than men in Germany (3.3 million of them were widows). There
were 100 men aged 20 to 30 for every 167 women in that age group.
[61] Many of these women needed a man not only as a companion
but also as a provider for the household in a time of
unprecedented misery and hardship. The soldiers of the victorious
Allied Armies exploited these women's vulnerability. Many young
girls and widows had liaisons with members of the occupying
forces. Many American and British soldiers paid for their
pleasures in cigarettes, chocolate, and bread. Children were
overjoyed at the gifts these strangers brought. A 10 year old boy
on hearing of such gifts from other children wished from all his
heart for an 'Englishman' for his mother so that she need not go
hungry any longer.
[62] We have to ask our own conscience at this point: What is
more dignifying to a woman? An accepted and respected second wife
as in the native Indians' approach, or a virtual prostitute as in
the 'civilised' Allies approach? In other words, what is more
dignifying to a woman, the Quranic prescription or the theology
based on the culture of the Roman Empire?
It
is interesting to note that in an international youth conference
held in Munich in 1948 the problem of the highly unbalanced sex
ratio in Germany was discussed. When it became clear that no
solution could be agreed upon, some participants suggested
polygamy. The initial reaction of the gathering was a mixture of
shock and disgust. However, after a careful study of the proposal,
the participants agreed that it was the only possible solution.
Consequently, polygamy was included among the conference final
recommendations.
[63]
The world today possesses more weapons of mass destruction than
ever before and the European churches might, sooner or later, be
obliged to accept polygamy as the only way out. Father Hillman has
thoughtfully recognized this fact, "It is quite conceivable that
these genocidal techniques (nuclear, biological, chemical..) could
produce so drastic an imbalance among the sexes that plural
marriage would become a necessary means of survival....Then
contrary to previous custom and law, an overriding natural and
moral inclination might arise in favour of polygamy. In such a
situation, theologians and church leaders would quickly produce
weighty reasons and biblical texts to justify a new conception of
marriage."
[64]
To
the present day, polygamy continues to be a viable solution to
some of the social ills of modern societies. The communal
obligations that the Quran mentions in association with the
permission of polygamy are more visible at present in some Western
societies than in Africa. For example, In the United States today,
there is a severe gender crisis in the black community. One out of
every twenty young black males may die before reaching the age of
21. For those between 20 and 35 years of age, homicide is the
leading cause of death.
[65] Besides, many young black males are unemployed, in jail,
or on dope.
[66] As a result, one in four black women, at age 40, has
never married, as compared with one in ten white women.
[67] Moreover, many young black females become single mothers
before the age of 20 and find themselves in need of providers. The
end result of these tragic circumstances is that an increasing
number of black women are engaged in what is called 'man-sharing'.
[68] That is, many of these hapless single black women are
involved in affairs with married men. The wives are often unaware
of the fact that other women are 'sharing' their husbands with
them. Some observers of the crisis of man-sharing in the African
American community strongly recommend consensual polygamy as a
temporary answer to the shortage of black males until more
comprehensive reforms in the American society at large are
undertaken.
[69] By consensual polygamy they mean a polygamy that is
sanctioned by the community and to which all the parties involved
have agreed, as opposed to the usually secret man-sharing which is
detrimental both to the wife and to the community in general. The
problem of man-sharing in the African American community was the
topic of a panel discussion held at Temple University in
Philadelphia on January 27, 1993.
[70] Some of the speakers recommended polygamy as one
potential remedy for the crisis. They also suggested that polygamy
should not be banned by law, particularly in a society that
tolerates prostitution and mistresses. The comment of one woman
from the audience that African Americans needed to learn from
Africa where polygamy was responsibly practiced elicited
enthusiastic applause.
Philip Kilbride, an American anthropologist of Roman Catholic
heritage, in his provocative book, Plural marriage for our time,
proposes polygamy as a solution to some of the ills of the
American society at large. He argues that plural marriage may
serve as a potential alternative for divorce in many cases in
order to obviate the damaging impact of divorce on many children.
He maintains that many divorces are caused by the rampant
extramarital affairs in the American society. According to
Kilbride, ending an extramarital affair in a polygamous marriage,
rather than in a divorce, is better for the children, "Children
would be better served if family augmentation rather than only
separation and dissolution were seen as options." Moreover, he
suggests that other groups will also benefit from plural marriage
such as: elderly women who face a chronic shortage of men and the
African Americans who are involved in man-sharing.
[71]
In
1987, a poll conducted by the student newspaper at the university
of California at Berkeley asked the students whether they agreed
that men should be allowed by law to have more than one wife in
response to a perceived shortage of male marriage candidates in
California. Almost all of the students polled approved of the
idea. One female student even stated that a polyganous marriage
would fulfil her emotional and physical needs while giving her
greater freedom than a monogamous union.
[72] In fact, this same argument is also used by the few
remaining fundamentalist Mormon women who still practice polygamy
in the U.S. They believe that polygamy is an ideal way for a woman
to have both a career and children since the wives help each other
care for the children.
[73]
It
has to be added that polygamy in Islam is a matter of mutual
consent. No one can force a woman to marry a married man. Besides,
the wife has the right to stipulate that her husband must not
marry any other woman as a second wife.
[74] The Bible, on the other hand, sometimes resorts to
forcible polygamy. A childless widow must marry her husband's
brother, even if he is already married (see the "Plight of Widows"
section),regardless of her consent (Genesis 38:8-10).
It
should be noted that in many Muslim societies today the practice
of polygamy is rare since the gap between the numbers of both
sexes is not huge. One can, safely, say that the rate of
polygamous marriages in the Muslim world is much less than the
rate of extramarital affairs in the West. In other words, men in
the Muslim world today are far more strictly monogamous than men
in the Western world.
Billy Graham, the eminent Christian evangelist has recognized this
fact: "Christianity cannot compromise on the question of polygamy.
If present-day Christianity cannot do so, it is to its own
detriment. Islam has permitted polygamy as a solution to social
ills and has allowed a certain degree of latitude to human nature
but only within the strictly defined framework of the law.
Christian countries make a great show of monogamy, but actually
they practice polygamy. No one is unaware of the part mistresses
play in Western society. In this respect Islam is a fundamentally
honest religion, and permits a Muslim to marry a second wife if he
must, but strictly forbids all clandestine amatory associations in
order to safeguard the moral probity of the community."
[75]
It
is of interest to note that many, non-Muslim as well as Muslim,
countries in the world today have outlawed polygamy. Taking a
second wife, even with the free consent of the first wife, is a
violation of the law. On the other hand, cheating on the wife,
without her knowledge or consent, is perfectly legitimate as far
as the law is concerned! What is the legal wisdom behind such a
contradiction? Is the law designed to reward deception and punish
honesty? It is one of the unfathomable paradoxes of our modern
'civilised' world.
16. THE VEIL
Finally, let us shed some light on what is considered in the West
as the greatest symbol of women's oppression and servitude, the
veil or the head cover. Is it true that there is no such thing as
the veil in the Judaeo-Christian tradition? Let us set the record
straight. According to Rabbi Dr. Menachem M. Brayer (Professor of
Biblical Literature at Yeshiva University) in his book, The Jewish
woman in Rabbinic literature, it was the custom of Jewish women to
go out in public with a head covering which, sometimes, even
covered the whole face leaving one eye free.
[76] He quotes some famous ancient Rabbis saying," It is not
like the daughters of Israel to walk out with heads uncovered" and
"Cursed be the man who lets the hair of his wife be seen....a
woman who exposes her hair for self-adornment brings poverty."
Rabbinic law forbids the recitation of blessings or prayers in the
presence of a bareheaded married woman since uncovering the
woman's hair is considered "nudity".
[77] Dr. Brayer also mentions that "During the Tannaitic
period the Jewish woman's failure to cover her head was considered
an affront to her modesty. When her head was uncovered she might
be fined four hundred zuzim for this offense." Dr. Brayer also
explains that veil of the Jewish woman was not always considered a
sign of modesty. Sometimes, the veil symbolized a state of
distinction and luxury rather than modesty. The veil personified
the dignity and superiority of noble women. It also represented a
woman's inaccessibility as a sanctified possession of her husband.
[78]
The veil signified a woman's self-respect and social status. Women
of lower classes would often wear the veil to give the impression
of a higher standing. The fact that the veil was the sign of
nobility was the reason why prostitutes were not permitted to
cover their hair in the old Jewish society. However, prostitutes
often wore a special headscarf in order to look respectable.
[79] Jewish women in Europe continued to wear veils until the
nineteenth century when their lives became more intermingled with
the surrounding secular culture. The external pressures of the
European life in the nineteenth century forced many of them to go
out bare-headed. Some Jewish women found it more convenient to
replace their traditional veil with a wig as another form of hair
covering. Today, most pious Jewish women do not cover their hair
except in the synagogue.
[80] Some of them, such as the Hasidic sects, still use the
wig.
[81]
What about the Christian tradition? It is well known that Catholic
Nuns have been covering their heads for hundreds of years, but
that is not all. St. Paul in the New Testament made some very
interesting statements about the veil:
"Now I want you to realize that the head of every
man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of
Christ is God. Every man who prays or prophesies with his head
covered dishonours his head. And every woman who prays or
prophesies with her head uncovered dishonours her head - it is
just as though her head were shaved. If a woman does not cover her
head, she should have her hair cut off; and if it is a disgrace
for a woman to have her hair cut off or shaved off, she should
cover her head. A man ought not to cover his head, since he is the
image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. For man
did not come from woman, but woman from man; neither was man
created for woman, but woman for man. For this reason, and because
of the angels, the woman ought to have a sign of authority on her
head" (I Corinthians 11:3-10).
St. Paul's rationale for veiling women is that the veil represents
a sign of the authority of the man, who is the image and glory of
God, over the woman who was created from and for man. St.
Tertullian in his famous treatise 'On The Veiling Of Virgins'
wrote, "Young women, you wear your veils out on the streets, so
you should wear them in the church, you wear them when you are
among strangers, then wear them among your brothers..." Among the
Canon laws of the Catholic church today, there is a law that
requires women to cover their heads in church.
[82] Some Christian denominations, such as the Amish and the
Mennonites for example, keep their women veiled to the present
day. The reason for the veil, as offered by their Church leaders,
is that "The head covering is a symbol of woman's subjection to
the man and to God", which is the same logic introduced by St.
Paul in the New Testament.
[83]
From all the above evidence, it is obvious that Islam did not
invent the head cover. However, Islam did endorse it. The Quran
urges the believing men and women to lower their gaze and guard
their modesty and then urges the believing women to extend their
head covers to cover the neck and the bosom:
"Say to the believing men that they should lower
their gaze and guard their modesty......And say to the believing
women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty;
that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except
what ordinarily appear thereof; that they should draw their veils
over their bosoms...." (24:30,31).
The Quran is quite clear that the veil is essential for modesty,
but why is modesty important? The Quran is still clear:
"O Prophet, tell your wives and daughters and the
believing women that they should cast their outer garments over
their bodies (when abroad) so that they should be known and not
molested" (33:59).
This is the whole point, modesty is prescribed to protect women
from molestation or simply, modesty is protection. Thus, the only
purpose of the veil in Islam is protection. The Islamic veil,
unlike the veil of the Christian tradition, is not a sign of man's
authority over woman nor is it a sign of woman's subjection to
man. The Islamic veil, unlike the veil in the Jewish tradition, is
not a sign of luxury and distinction of some noble married women.
The Islamic veil is only a sign of modesty with the purpose of
protecting women, all women. The Islamic philosophy is that it is
always better to be safe than sorry. In fact, the Quran is so
concerned with protecting women's bodies and women's reputation
that a man who dares to falsely accuse a woman of unchastity will
be severely punished:
"And those who launch a charge against chaste
women, and produce not four witnesses (to support their
allegations)- Flog them with eighty stripes; and reject their
evidence ever after: for such men are wicked transgressors" (24:4)
Compare this strict Quranic attitude with the extremely lax
punishment for rape in the Bible:
" If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not
pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he
shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry
the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as
long as he lives" (Deut. 22:28-30)
One must ask a simple question here, who is really punished? The
man who only paid a fine for rape, or the girl who is forced to
marry the man who raped her and live with him until he dies?
Another question that also should be asked is this: which is more
protective of women, the Quranic strict attitude or the Biblical
lax attitude?
Some people, especially in the West, would tend to ridicule the
whole argument of modesty for protection. Their argument is that
the best protection is the spread of education, civilised
behaviour, and self restraint. We would say: fine but not enough.
If 'civilization' is enough protection, then why is it that women
in North America dare not walk alone in a dark street - or even
across an empty parking lot ? If Education is the solution, then
why is it that a respected university like Queen's has a 'walk
home service' mainly for female students on campus? If self
restraint is the answer, then why are cases of sexual harassment
in the workplace reported on the news media every day? A sample of
those accused of sexual harassment, in the last few years,
includes: Navy officers, Managers, University professors,
Senators, Supreme Court Justices, and the President of the United
States! I could not believe my eyes when I read the following
statistics, written in a pamphlet issued by the Dean of Women's
office at Queen's University:
·
In Canada, a woman is sexually assaulted every 6
minutes,
·
1 in 3 women in Canada will be sexually assaulted
at some time in their lives,
·
1 in 4 women are at the risk of rape or attempted
rape in her lifetime,
·
1 in 8 women will be sexually assaulted while
attending college or university, and
·
A study found 60% of Canadian university-aged males
said they would commit sexual assault if they were certain they
wouldn't get caught.
Something is fundamentally wrong in the society we live in. A
radical change in the society's life style and culture is
absolutely necessary. A culture of modesty is badly needed,
modesty in dress, in speech, and in manners of both men and women.
Otherwise, the grim statistics will grow even worse day after day
and, unfortunately, women alone will be paying the price.
Actually, we all suffer but as K. Gibran has said, "...for the
person who receives the blows is not like the one who counts
them."
[84] Therefore, a society like France which expels young women
from schools because of their modest dress is, in the end, simply
harming itself.
It
is one of the great ironies of our world today that the very same
headscarf revered as a sign of 'holiness' when worn for the
purpose of showing the authority of man by Catholic Nuns, is
reviled as a sign of 'oppression' when worn for the purpose of
protection by Muslim women.
17. EPILOGUE
The one question all the non-Muslims, who had read an earlier
version of this study, had in common was: do Muslim women in the
Muslim world today receive this noble treatment described here?
The answer, unfortunately, is: No. Since this question is
inevitable in any discussion concerning the status of women in
Islam, we have to elaborate on the answer in order to provide the
reader with the complete picture.
It
has to be made clear first that the vast differences among Muslim
societies make most generalizations too simplistic. There is a
wide spectrum of attitudes towards women in the Muslim world
today. These attitudes differ from one society to another and
within each individual society. Nevertheless, certain general
trends are discernible. Almost all Muslim societies have, to one
degree or another, deviated from the ideals of Islam with respect
to the status of women. These deviations have, for the most part,
been in one of two opposite directions. The first direction is
more conservative, restrictive, and traditions-oriented, while the
second is more liberal and Western-oriented.
The societies that have digressed in the first direction treat
women according to the customs and traditions inherited from their
forebears. These traditions usually deprive women of many rights
granted to them by Islam. Besides, women are treated according to
standards far different from those applied to men. This
discrimination pervades the life of any female: she is received
with less joy at birth than a boy; she is less likely to go to
school; she might be deprived any share of her family's
inheritance; she is under continuous surveillance in order not to
behave immodestly while her brother's immodest acts are tolerated;
she might even be killed for committing what her male family
members usually boast of doing; she has very little say in family
affairs or community interests; she might not have full control
over her property and her marriage gifts; and finally as a mother
she herself would prefer to produce boys so that she can attain a
higher status in her community.
On
the other hand, there are Muslim societies (or certain classes
within some societies) that have been swept over by the Western
culture and way of life. These societies often imitate
unthinkingly whatever they receive from the West and usually end
up adopting the worst fruits of Western civilization. In these
societies, a typical "modern" woman's top priority in life is to
enhance her physical beauty. Therefore, she is often obsessed with
her body's shape, size, and weight. She tends to care more about
her body than her mind and more about her charms than her
intellect. Her ability to charm, attract, and excite is more
valued in the society than her educational achievements,
intellectual pursuits, and social work. One is not expected to
find a copy of the Quran in her purse since it is full of
cosmetics that accompany her wherever she goes. Her spirituality
has no room in a society preoccupied with her attractiveness.
Therefore, she would spend her life striving more to realize her
femininity than to fulfil her humanity.
Why did Muslim societies deviate from the ideals of Islam? There
is no easy answer. A penetrating explanation of the reasons why
Muslims have not adhered to the Quranic guidance with respect to
women would be beyond the scope of this study. It has to be made
clear, however, that Muslim societies have deviated from the
Islamic precepts concerning so many aspects of their lives for so
long. There is a wide gap between what Muslims are supposed to
believe in and what they actually practice. This gap is not a
recent phenomenon. It has been there for centuries and has been
widening day after day. This ever widening gap has had disastrous
consequences on the Muslim world manifested in almost all aspects
of life: political tyranny and fragmentation, economic
backwardness, social injustice, scientific bankruptcy,
intellectual stagnation, etc. The non-Islamic status of
women in the Muslim world today is merely a symptom of a deeper
malady. Any reform in the current status of Muslim women is not
expected to be fruitful if not accompanied with more comprehensive
reforms of the Muslim societies' whole way of life. The Muslim
world is in need for a renaissance that will bring it closer to
the ideals of Islam and not further from them. To sum up, the
notion that the poor status of Muslim women today is because of
Islam is an utter misconception. The problems of Muslims in
general are not due to too much attachment to Islam, they are the
culmination of a long and deep detachment from it.
It
has, also, to be re-emphasized that the purpose behind this
comparative study is not, by any means, to defame Judaism or
Christianity. The position of women in the Judaeo-Christian
tradition might seem frightening by our late twentieth century
standards. Nevertheless, it has to be viewed within the proper
historical context. In other words, any objective assessment of
the position of women in the Judaeo-Christian tradition has to
take into account the historical circumstances in which this
tradition developed. There can be no doubt that the views of the
Rabbis and the Church Fathers regarding women were influenced by
the prevalent attitudes towards women in their societies. The
Bible itself was written by different authors at different times.
These authors could not have been impervious to the values and the
way of life of the people around them. For example, the adultery
laws of the Old Testament are so biased against women that they
defy rational explanation by our mentality. However, if we
consider the fact that the early Jewish tribes were obsessed with
their genetic homogeneity and extremely eager to define themselves
apart from the surrounding tribes and that only sexual misconduct
by the married females of the tribes could threaten these
cherished aspirations, we should then be able to understand, but
not necessarily sympathize with, the reasons for this bias. Also,
the diatribes of the Church Fathers against women should not be
detached from the context of the misogynist Greco-Roman culture in
which they lived. It would be unfair to evaluate the
Judaeo-Christian legacy without giving any consideration to the
relevant historical context.
In
fact, a proper understanding of the Judaeo-Christian historical
context is also crucial for understanding the significance of the
contributions of Islam to world history and human civilization.
The Judaeo-Christian tradition had been influenced and shaped by
the environments, conditions, and cultures in which it had
existed. By the seventh century C.E., this influence had distorted
the original divine message revealed to Moses and Jesus beyond
recognition. The poor status of women in the Judaeo-Christian
world by the seventh century is just one case in point. Therefore,
there was a great need for a new divine message that would guide
humanity back to the straight path. The Quran described the
mission of the new Messenger as a release for Jews and Christians
from the heavy burdens that had been upon them: "Those who follow
the Messenger, the unlettered Prophet, whom they find mentioned in
their own Scriptures--In the Law and the Gospel-- For he commands
them what is just and forbids them what is evil; he allows them as
lawful what is good and prohibits them from what is bad; He
releases them from their heavy burdens and from the yokes that are
upon them" (7:157).
Therefore, Islam should not be viewed as a rival tradition to
Judaism or Christianity. It has to be regarded as the
consummation, completion, and perfection of the divine messages
that had been revealed before it.
At
the end of this study, I would like to offer the following advice
to the global Muslim community. So many Muslim women have been
denied their basic Islamic rights for so long. The mistakes of the
past have to be corrected. To do that is not a favor, it is a duty
incumbent upon all Muslims. The worldwide Muslim community have to
issue a charter of Muslim women's rights based on the instructions
of the Quran and the teachings of the Prophet of Islam. This
charter must give Muslim women all the rights endowed to them by
their Creator. Then, all the necessary means have to be developed
in order to ensure the proper implementation of the charter. This
charter is long overdue, but it is better late than never. If
Muslims worldwide will not guarantee the full Islamic rights of
their mothers, wives, sisters, and daughters, who else will ?
Furthermore, we must have the courage to confront our past and
reject outright the traditions and customs of our forefathers
whenever they contravene the precepts of Islam. Did the Quran not
severely criticize the pagan Arabs for blindly following the
traditions of their ancestors? On the other hand, we have to
develop a critical attitude towards whatever we receive from the
West or from any other culture. Interaction with and learning from
other cultures is an invaluable experience. The Quran has
succinctly considered this interaction as one of the purposes of
creation: " O mankind We created you from a single pair of a male
and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may
know each other" (49:13). It goes without saying, however, that
blind imitation of others is a sure sign of an utter lack of
self-esteem.
It
is to the non-Muslim reader, Jewish, Christian, or otherwise, that
these final words are dedicated. It is bewildering why the
religion that had revolutionized the status of women is being
singled out and denigrated as so repressive of women. This
perception about Islam is one of the most widespread myths in our
world today. This myth is being perpetuated by a ceaseless barrage
of sensational books, articles, media images, and Hollywood
movies. The inevitable outcome of these incessant misleading
images has been total misunderstanding and fear of anything
related to Islam. This negative portrayal of Islam in the world
media has to end if we are to live in a world free from all traces
of discrimination, prejudice, and misunderstanding. Non-Muslims
ought to realize the existence of a wide gap between Muslims'
beliefs and practices and the simple fact that the actions of
Muslims do not necessarily represent Islam. To label the status of
women in the Muslim world today as "Islamic" is as far from the
truth as labelling the position of women in the West today as
"Judaeo-Christian". With this understanding in mind, Muslims and
non-Muslims should start a process of communication and dialogue
in order to remove all misconceptions, suspicions, and fears. A
peaceful future for the human family necessitates such a dialogue.
Islam should be viewed as a religion that had immensely improved
the status of women and had granted them many rights that the
modern world has recognized only this century. Islam still has so
much to offer today's woman: dignity, respect, and protection in
all aspects and all stages of her life from birth until death in
addition to the recognition, the balance, and means for the
fulfilment of all her spiritual, intellectual, physical, and
emotional needs. No wonder most of those who choose to become
Muslims in a country like Britain are women. In the U.S. women
converts to Islam outnumber male converts 4 to 1.
[85] Islam has so much to offer our world which is in great
need of moral guidance and leadership. Ambassador Herman Eilts, in
a testimony in front of the committee on Foreign Affairs of the
House of Representatives of the United States Congress on June
24th, 1985, said, "The Muslim community of the globe today is in
the neighbourhood of one billion. That is an impressive figure.
But what to me is equally impressive is that Islam today is the
fastest growing monotheistic religion. This is something we have
to take into account. Something is right about Islam. It is
attracting a good many people." Yes, something is right about
Islam and it is time to find that out. I hope this study is a step
on this direction.
NOTES
1.
The Globe and Mail, Oct. 4,1994.
2. Leonard J. Swidler, Women in Judaism: the Status of Women in
Formative Judaism (Metuchen, N.J: Scarecrow Press, 1976) p. 115.
3. Thena Kendath, "Memories of an Orthodox youth" in Susannah
Heschel, ed. On being a Jewish Feminist (New York: Schocken Books,
1983), pp. 96-97.
4. Swidler, op. cit., pp. 80-81.
5. Rosemary R. Ruether, "Christianity", in Arvind Sharma, ed.,
Women in World Religions (Albany: State University of New York
Press, 1987) p. 209.
6. For all the sayings of the prominent Saints, see Karen
Armstrong, The Gospel According to Woman (London: Elm Tree Books,
1986) pp. 52-62. See also Nancy van Vuuren, The Subversion of
Women as Practiced by Churches, Witch-Hunters, and Other Sexists
(Philadelphia: Westminister Press) pp. 28-30.
7. Swidler, op. cit., p. 140.
8. Denise L. Carmody, "Judaism", in Arvind Sharma, ed., op. cit.,
p. 197.
9. Swidler, op. cit., p. 137.
10. Ibid., p. 138.
11. Sally Priesand, Judaism and the New Woman (New York: Behrman
House, Inc., 1975) p. 24.
12. Swidler, op. cit., p. 115.
13. Lesley Hazleton, Israeli Women The Reality Behind the Myths
(New York: Simon and Schuster, 1977) p. 41.
14. Gage, op. cit. p. 142.
15. Jeffrey H. Togay, "Adultery," Encyclopaedia Judaica, Vol. II,
col. 313. Also, see Judith Plaskow, Standing Again at Sinai:
Judaism from a Feminist Perspective (New York: Harper & Row
Publishers, 1990) pp. 170-177.
16. Hazleton, op. cit., pp. 41-42.
17. Swidler, op. cit., p. 141.
18. Matilda J. Gage, Woman, Church, and State (New York: Truth
Seeker Company, 1893) p. 141.
19. Louis M. Epstein, The Jewish Marriage Contract (New York: Arno
Press, 1973) p. 149.
20. Swidler, op. cit., p. 142.
21. Epstein, op. cit., pp. 164-165.
22. Ibid., pp. 112-113. See also Priesand, op. cit., p. 15.
23. James A. Brundage, Law, Sex, and Christian Society in Medieval
Europe ( Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1987) p. 88.
24. Ibid., p. 480.
25. R. Thompson, Women in Stuart England and America (London:
Routledge & Kegan Paul, 1974) p. 162.
26. Mary Murray, The Law of the Father (London: Routledge, 1995)
p. 67.
27. Gage, op. cit., p. 143.
28. For example, see Jeffrey Lang, Struggling to Surrender,
(Beltsville, MD: Amana Publications, 1994) p. 167.
29. Elsayyed Sabiq, Fiqh al Sunnah (Cairo: Darul Fatah lile'lam
Al-Arabi, 11th edition, 1994), vol. 2, pp. 218-229.
30. Abdel-Haleem Abu Shuqqa, Tahreer al Mar'aa fi Asr al Risala
(Kuwait: Dar al Qalam, 1990) pp. 109-112.
31. Leila Badawi, "Islam", in Jean Holm and John Bowker, ed.,
Women in Religion (London: Pinter Publishers, 1994) p. 102.
32. Amir H. Siddiqi, Studies in Islamic History (Karachi:
Jamiyatul Falah Publications, 3rd edition, 1967) p. 138.
33. Epstein, op. cit., p. 196.
34. Swidler, op. cit., pp. 162-163.
35. The Toronto Star, Apr. 8, 1995.
36. Sabiq, op. cit., pp. 318-329. See also Muhammad al Ghazali,
Qadaya al Mar'aa bin al Taqaleed al Rakida wal Wafida (Cairo: Dar
al Shorooq, 4th edition, 1992) pp. 178-180.
37. Ibid., pp. 313-318.
38. David W. Amram, The Jewish Law of Divorce According to Bible
and Talmud ( Philadelphia: Edward Stern & CO., Inc., 1896) pp.
125-126.
39. Epstein, op. cit., p. 219.
40. Ibid, pp 156-157.
41. Muhammad Abu Zahra, Usbu al Fiqh al Islami (Cairo: al Majlis
al A'la li Ri'ayat al Funun, 1963) p. 66.
442. Epstein, op. cit., p. 122.
43. Armstrong, op. cit., p. 8.
44. Epstein, op. cit., p. 175.
45. Ibid., p. 121.
46. Gage, op. cit., p. 142.
47. B. Aisha Lemu and Fatima Heeren, Woman in Islam (London:
Islamic Foundation, 1978) p. 23.
48. Hazleton, op. cit., pp. 45-46.
49. Ibid., p. 47.
50. Ibid., p. 49.
51. Swidler, op. cit., pp. 144-148.
52. Hazleton, op. cit., pp 44-45.
53. Eugene Hillman, Polygamy Reconsidered: African Plural Marriage
and the Christian Churches (New York: Orbis Books, 1975) p. 140.
54. Ibid., p. 17.
55. Ibid., pp. 88-93.
56. Ibid., pp. 92-97.
57. Philip L. Kilbride, Plural Marriage For Our Times (Westport,
Conn.: Bergin & Garvey, 1994) pp. 108-109.
58. The Weekly Review, Aug. 1, 1987.
59. Kilbride, op. cit., p. 126.
60. John D'Emilio and Estelle B. Freedman, Intimate Matters: A
history of Sexuality in America (New York: Harper & Row
Publishers, 1988) p. 87.
61. Ute Frevert, Women in German History: from Bourgeois
Emancipation to Sexual Liberation (New York: Berg Publishers,
1988) pp. 263-264.
62. Ibid., pp. 257-258.
63. Sabiq, op. cit., p. 191.
64. Hillman, op. cit., p. 12.
65. Nathan Hare and Julie Hare, ed., Crisis in Black Sexual
Politics (San Francisco: Black Think Tank, 1989) p. 25.
66. Ibid., p. 26.
67. Kilbride, op. cit., p. 94.
68. Ibid., p. 95.
69. Ibid.
70. Ibid., pp. 95-99.
71. Ibid., p. 118.
72. Lang, op. cit., p. 172.
73. Kilbride, op. cit., pp. 72-73.
74. Sabiq, op. cit., pp. 187-188.
75. Abdul Rahman Doi, Woman in Shari'ah (London: Ta-Ha Publishers,
1994) p. 76.
76. Menachem M. Brayer, The Jewish Woman in Rabbinic Literature: A
Psychosocial Perspective (Hoboken, N.J: Ktav Publishing House,
1986) p. 239.
77. Ibid., pp. 316-317. Also see Swidler, op. cit., pp. 121-123.
78. Ibid., p. 139.
79. Susan W. Schneider, Jewish and Female (New York: Simon &
Schuster, 1984) p. 237.
80. Ibid., pp. 238-239.
81. Alexandra Wright, "Judaism", in Holm and Bowker, ed., op.
cit., pp. 128-129
82. Clara M. Henning, "Cannon Law and the Battle of the Sexes" in
Rosemary R. Ruether, ed., Religion and Sexism: Images of Woman in
the Jewish and Christian Traditions (New York: Simon and Schuster,
1974) p. 272.
83. Donald B. Kraybill, The riddle of the Amish Culture
(Baltimore: Johns Hopkins University Press, 1989) p. 56.
84. Khalil Gibran, Thoughts and Meditations (New York: Bantam
Books, 1960) p. 28.
85. The Times, Nov. 18, 1993.
Note
in addition: This manuscript has been published by
WAMY, 1995.
Note: This document is copyrighted by the
author. He allows any form of reproduction
as long as
it is not for profit and provided that the text of the book is
NOT changed.